Who could have imagined that a low-speed collision with a gallery rope would occasion a loss of critical faculty? But then, that presumes Bryson DeChambeau had a firm grasp on logic or fact before he banjoed himself in front of tens of spectators at a recent LIV tournament in Chicago. If nothing else, the resulting viral video finally brought eyeballs to the LIV product, and perhaps some comfort to its CEO to see someone else suffer an embarrassing choke inside the ropes.
The discombobulated DeChambeau didn’t seem to have all synapses firing at LIV’s latest event for guys who want to spend more time at home, this one held in Thailand, a dozen time zones from his bed in Texas. He was angered that the Official World Golf Ranking declined to award points to LIV’s Bangkok stop within 24 hours of the Saudi-funded enterprise announcing an alliance with the near-defunct MENA Tour, which is recognized by the OWGR but hasn’t actually staged a tournament in more than two years.
“They’re delaying the inevitable. We’ve hit every mark in their criteria, so for us not to get points is kind of crazy … we have the top players in the world … we deserve to be getting world ranking points,” DeChambeau said, with an air of entitlement more befitting a Crown Prince than one of his play things.
He would benefit from borrowing Pat Perez’s copy of Nietzsche’s Untimely Meditations, in which the philosopher wrote that “the historical audit brings so much to light which is false and absurd … that the condition of pious illusion falls to pieces.” Because DeChambeau’s self-righteous claim that LIV has met all of the OWGR criteria is entirely false and absurd.
LIV’s existing structure falls short of many of the conventions long-established for tours to qualify for world ranking points. Let’s leave aside the first requirement — embracing inclusion and promoting non-discrimination, a formidable impediment for misogynistic bonesaw enthusiasts and their apologists. On rules around format, cuts and average field sizes over the course of a season, LIV is non-compliant. Nor are LIV events accessible via a legitimate qualification process, since entry is determined largely by Greg Norman’s use of MBS’s checkbook. Defenders will point to LIV’s proposed relegation system but that is meritless since some players are contractually exempt from being demoted, regardless of performance.
Tours must be compliant with OWGR standards for a year…
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